InfinitE ReSuRRection

On a perpetual nightmare [an undying season of torturous brain weather]…

The hope of an escape that would annihilate the mind for good,
walked the plank - much farther than that point were earth and universe merge as time without end
and I did emerge as what I had been before – a dreamer with but a vision to defend;
a dreamer, with but fantasies on which to depend.
But as keenly as a virus infiltrating pores,
all that had been declared godly entered my heart;
as keenly as the chauvinist instigating chores,
all that was supposed satanic entered my heart.
Only astonished, I fell to knees on shredded memories.
Only astonished, I searched the sky for emotions to apply.
Much more than astonished, my sickness deep inside, for once, did not confide;
merely doubled up then died.

As I stood by a cavernous hill, where at the age of 30 years I was born,
I questioned why it had taken all those years for my foetal mind to form,
an exquisite feeling sat down next to me and proclaimed a notion of intent -
that all life would live inside of me, if I would just allow a magick, heaven sent.
“But faith in the untouchable holds no part of me!” I did reply.
That feeling looked toward myself with a portrait of perplexing insanity
and I knew, right there and then, that I could become the secret five percent
I held in awe throughout all my tragedies but never spent.
That those years that came before, all the evil would be no more,
the black in me would go below and burn in hell forevermore.

So I left man’s sacrilege behind and did descend that lonely place,
as I walked toward new life, unspeakable beauty by my side,
a distant music did touch me somewhere never touched before;
questions did arise but I just let them fall…
I turned to look and she looked back at me, eyes that only purity could believe.
We walked on and on towards eternity, knowing that uncertainty is life
and inside life the only surety is mortality.
We walked on and on, past much suffering and pain…
There were carnivals, exhibitions, theatres of decadence and ever-lasting inquisitions,
ships were sinking; men were killing, dams were bursting and blood distilling.

Then came the point I stood to listen and became conscious of an understanding
there and then I made the eternal connection,
The mystery of life revealed... Infinite Resurrection.

iF my fatHer waS a kinG theN I mighT be a liviD doG

Sanctifying comforter; brazen shall thee forever be,
secret words, narcotic in their leanings
but senseless in reality
will betray the origin of meaning;
cleanse these dirty cells in disinfected truth,
recycled instances of translucent matter
and understand, do understand,
each cog that turns does turn for thee.

All but truth does conquer, deliver;
abundantly and anally, explain the course of justice,
allow thou moments to consider
the indignity of expectant purpose;
for the processes of existence
do cast a surely blacker night -
a flaw inside the raging organ -
that might greet a man with death
than curse a twisted prince with burden.

And tremble thou, penetrate; do touch deep
paradise and future days: promise without hesitance
that both may come as cheap
as the awkwardness of reverence;
and purity, escape this place
awash the path with sanctity
and purity, consume the preying wake
expel thou notion that does breed insanity.

LO beHOLD, i lefT mE heRE

Where the slopes are steep,
I thanked the lord for mercies granted,
for lo behold, a life to reap,
and deep in soil, my regrets were planted.

One motionless day, ten years later,
My life embroiled in stagnation,
I had become life’s true hater
And spat at the notion of creation

I climbed the slopes once more,
and lo behold, a weeping tree did stand,
though nothing i had heard in lore,
prepared me for a sight so grand.
One million tears fell from the branches
regret’s own tree with vigour dances
a dance of melancholic longing
a dance that lasts until the morning.

I turned to go and felt cold leaves,
wrap around my crisp shirtsleeves,
I turned to go but could not leave,
I cried for help but could achieve,
only sorrow ever more
only longing need to go.

So here I stand, beside that tree,
regret lives deep inside of me,
I pass the days deep in need,
and to the lord I do plead
to free me from my own sorrow,
and deliver me into tomorrow
but lo behold, no one listened
just left me here, life imprisoned.